by S. M. C.
"Hamilton is the most modern city in New Zealand in its appearance. It is a welcome site to see imagination and originality being used in architecture in the more modern homes, and above all, to see that some brave souls have broken with tradition enough to paint their homes some other colour than chicken-house cream."
Robin W. Winks, "These New Zealanders"
Whitcombe & Tombs Ltd. (1954)
Welcome to this page. Here I intend to complain a lot and be a complete snob, and all over a few buildings. There are many buildings I have not mentioned here, I have simply tried to include those that are either examples of architectural genius or else are truly vile mistakes.
The main Mormon Temple in Hamilton - and perhaps even New Zealand - may be found in a suburb that is not only well named but also well located. Templeview, while not exactly separate from the humming metropolis that is Hamilton, sits quietly on the city's borders as a reminder to us all that religiosity and taste do not always march hand in hand. Like a great "chicken-house cream" lump of Lego, the temple perches - or, rather, squats - blandly on one of the few hills in Hamilton visible in every direction for many miles (which, I suppose, is the idea, as all that land is rumoured to be owned by the Latter-Day Saints). Unless you are a Mormon you are forbidden entrance to the Temple and this is a shame; the money saved on the exterior suggests the interior must be frivolously ornate and fabulously High Church.
If you're one of those people that like the tackiness of Christmas, then Templeview is the place for you in the weeks leading up to the 25th of December. Thousands of coloured lights, heavenly choirs, and Nativity scenes are worth seeing even for the most cynical reasons - but be warned: the place is infested with children.
Mormons aren't the only people in Hamilton who can't get their churches right. Witness, why don't you, the Catholic Church on Grey Street. Many modern churches appear insipid to me, and this building in particular is a fine argument for reviving Gothic architecture (it's been revived before, so why not?). The stained glass window is fairly impressive, even if it dwarfs the rest of the building (making it look like the rear of some kind of space ship). It just ain't right. Interestingly, the statue of Jesus (upon his resurrection?) has been without a left hand for several years, a spooky effect that distracts one's gaze from the church.
[Editors note: It has been pointed out by an attentive reader that this building is not, in fact, the Catholic Church, but the Catholic Cathedral. At first we found this a little hard to believe, but it does explain the big sign out the front with "Cathedral" written on it. SMC, when asked to comment on the distinction, said only: "Oh how I detest being corrected."]
The University chapel gives me further cause to whine and moan. Whoever designed it was clearly an efficient kind of person, not much given to including that which was not practical and cheap. Luckily for us, they threw in a steeple (of sorts) topped with a large (-ish) cross, so we can know that it is, in fact, a chapel.
Most of the other churches in Hamilton are quite as dreary as the three I've mentioned. It is hardly a phenomena unique to this one city, but as I have an intense dislike of modern churches I felt I had to write this diatribe. Fortunately (for me, at least) there are some churches here that are fantastic buildings. One fine example is St. Peters Cathedral, which, by being big, old, and on a hill, has all the appearances of being haunted. The fact that someone fell to his death from its roof a few years ago only adds to the effect. On a stormy day it looks fantastically spooky. A silly reason to like a building, perhaps, but there it is.
The city's mosque is also worth seeing. It's hardly the Dome of the Rock, but I find the sight of a minaret in suburban Hamilton quite refreshing, even picturesque. Unfortunately it was the target of an arson attack not long after it opened, and as Hamilton is too small to support a Mosque doctor, mundane agencies were called upon to effect its repair.
There are many villas in Hamilton. This is good because they are nice to look at, aluminium-free, not open-plan, and old (which means they have "character") - all attributes that contribute to the ideal home. I shudder to think how many were torn down that blocks of flats might be erected in their place. For some detestable reason, blocks of flats are rather common in Hamilton East, where most villas are. (For that matter, they're rather common wherever they appear.)
The best:
This house is the finest and most aesthetically-pleasing building in the entire Waikato region, I have decided. How could anyone argue otherwise? Sadly it is surrounded by some of the most horrific houses in Hamilton.
The worst:
Hamilton's most ghastly building is, I think, the Warehouse store in
town. It looks like one of those tacky kit-set garages, only several
hundred times larger, and red. Very, very red, actually - one cannot
fail to see it. I don't know whether The Warehouse were aiming for a
'warehouse' look or if they are just cheap, but either way, function
won over aesthetics. This doesn't excuse the colour; if it wasn't red
it wouldn't be nearly so objectionable. But red it is. Hamilton's own
answer to Ayers Rock.
